(Commenting on a cigar he extracted from Monica Lewinsky's vagina and stuck in his mouth)
Funk & Wagnalls California Series Standard College Dictionary defines "Intern" as, "An advanced student in a field other than medicine who is undergoing supervised practical training."
Mr. Clinton used, abused, confused and misused Monica Lewinsky, a White House intern.
Howard Stern's radio broadcasts, Mr. Stern used, abused, confused and misused many interns of Westinghouse/CBS owned radio station WXRK-FM in New York.
Is there a difference between the Oval Office and the Public Airwaves? The answer, of course, is no!
Both are public trusts and both have been violated for personal gain.
This web page provides detailed discussions of both William Jefferson Clinton and Howard Alan Stern's sexual exploitation of young female interns and, in Stern's case, young male interns as well.
Wednesday, November 15, 1995
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she had her first
sexual contact with the President on the
evening of Wednesday, November 15, 1995,
while she was an intern at the White House.
Two times that evening, the President invited
Ms. Lewinsky to meet him near the Oval
Office. On the first occasion, the
President took Ms. Lewinsky back into the
Oval Office study, and they kissed. On
the second, she performed oral sex on the
President in the hallway outside the Oval
Office study. During this encounter, the
President directly touched and kissed
Ms. Lewinsky's bare breasts. In addition,
the President put his hand down
Ms. Lewinsky's pants and directly stimulated
her genitalia.
Friday, November 17, 1995
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she met with the
President again two days later, on Friday,
November 17, 1995. During that encounter,
Ms. Lewinsky stated, she performed oral sex
on the President in the private bathroom
outside the Oval Office study. The
President initiated the oral sex by unzipping
his pants and exposing his genitals.
Ms. Lewinsky understood the President's
actions to be a sign that he wanted her to
perform oral sex on him. During this
encounter, the President also fondled
Ms. Lewinsky's bare breasts with his hands
and kissed her breasts.
Sunday, December 31, 1995
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she met with the
President on New Year's Eve, Sunday, December
31, 1995, after the President invited her to
the Oval Office. Once there, the
President lifted Ms. Lewinsky's sweater,
fondled her bare breasts with his hands, and
kissed her breasts. She stated that she
performed oral sex on the President in the
hallway outside the Oval Office study.
Sunday, January 7, 1996
Monica Lewinsky testified that she performed
oral sex on the President in the bathroom
outside the Oval Office study during the late
afternoon on Sunday, January 7, 1996. The
President arranged this encounter by calling
Ms. Lewinsky at home and inviting her to
visit. On that occasion, the President
and Ms. Lewinsky went into the bathroom,
where he fondled her bare breasts with his
hands and mouth. During this encounter, the
President stated that he wanted to perform
oral sex on Ms. Lewinsky, but she stopped him
for a physical reason.
Sunday, January 21, 1996
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she and the
President had a sexual encounter on the
afternoon of Sunday, January 21, 1996, after
he invited her to the Oval Office. The
President lifted Ms. Lewinsky's top and
fondled her bare breasts. The President
unzipped his pants and exposed his genitals,
and she performed oral sex on him in the
hallway outside the Oval Office study.
Sunday, February 4, 1996
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she and the
President had sexual contact in the Oval
Office study and in the adjacent hallway on
the afternoon of Sunday, February 4,
1996. That day, the President had called
Ms. Lewinsky. During their encounter, the
President partially removed Ms. Lewinsky's
dress and bra and touched her bare breasts
with his mouth and hands. He also directly
touched her genitalia. Ms. Lewinsky
performed oral sex on the President.
Sunday, March 31, 1996
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she and the
President had sexual contact in the hallway
outside the Oval Office study during the late
afternoon of Sunday, March 31, 1996. The
President arranged this encounter by calling
Ms. Lewinsky and inviting her to the Oval
Office. During this encounter, Ms. Lewinsky
did not perform oral sex on the President.
The President fondled Ms. Lewinsky's bare
breasts with his hands and mouth and fondled
her genitalia directly by pulling her
underwear out of the way. In addition, the
President inserted a cigar into
Ms. Lewinsky's vagina then placed the cigar into his mouth and said, "It tastes good!"
Sunday, April 7, 1996
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she and the
President had sexual contact on Easter
Sunday, April 7, 1996, in the hallway outside
the Oval Office study and in the study
itself. On that occasion, the President
touched Ms. Lewinsky's breasts, both through
her clothing and directly. After the
President unzipped his pants, Ms. Lewinsky
also performed oral sex on him.
Friday, February 28, 1997
Ms. Lewinsky testified that her next sexual
encounter with the President occurred on
Friday, February 28, 1997, in the early
evening. The President initiated this
encounter by having his secretary Betty
Currie call Ms. Lewinsky to invite her to the
White House for a radio address. After the
address, Ms. Lewinsky and the President
kissed by the bathroom. The President
unbuttoned her dress and fondled her breasts,
first with her bra on and then directly. He
touched her genitalia through her clothes,
but not directly, on this occasion.
Ms. Lewinsky performed oral sex on him.
On this day, Ms. Lewinsky was wearing a blue
dress that forensic tests have conclusively
shown was stained with the President's
semen.
Saturday, March 29, 1997
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she and the
President had sexual contact on the afternoon
of March 29, 1997, in the Oval Office
study. On that occasion, the President
unbuttoned Ms. Lewinsky's blouse and touched
her breasts through her bra, but not
directly. He also put his hands inside
Ms. Lewinsky's pants and stimulated her
genitalia. Ms. Lewinsky performed oral
sex on him, and they also had brief, direct
genital-to-genital contact.
Two Subsequent Meetings
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she met with
President Clinton in the Oval Office study on
the morning of Saturday, August 16, 1997.
They kissed, and Ms. Lewinsky touched the
President's genitals through his clothing,
but he rebuffed her efforts to perform oral
sex. No other sexual acts occurred during
this encounter.
On Sunday, December 28, 1997, three weeks
before the President's civil deposition in
the Jones case, the President and
Ms. Lewinsky met in the Oval Office. In
addition to discussing a number of issues
that are analyzed below, they engaged in
"passionate" kissing -- she said, "I don't
call it a brief kiss." No other sexual
contact occurred.
Phone Sex
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she and the
President engaged in "phone sex"
approximately fifteen times. The President
initiated each phone sex encounter by
telephoning Ms. Lewinsky.
February 6, 1996 - Another Scary Intern
Howard brought in the most frightening intern yet! James, a 32 year old
college student, was telling us about his f'd up life today. This is a guy
that buys 300 hits of acid at a Grateful Dead concert and uses 7 of them
a day until their gone. He also told us that for fun in Indiana he and his
brother would go out and blow away pigs with a .357 while stoned. Hey, who
hasn't? He also had some advice for getting rid of genital crabs...pour
gasoline on your crotch! That's what he did. Just get in the shower and
pour it on! But wait, there's more! His stomach is f'd up from some kind
of medication that he took when he was younger so when he drinks milk he
gets gas and can fart on cue. So tomorrow Howard wants him to show us his
talent.
April 15, 1996 - The Virgin intern update
On Friday, this intern told Howard his story of not being able to have
sex with his girlfriend of 5 years. Today he was in again and his girlfriend
was on the phone. She didn't give her name because she was sort of embarrassed.
This intern, Sean, thinks that his weenie is too big for her. Howard saw
it on Friday and said it wasn't that big. It turns out that she doesn't
go screaming out of the room when he tries to enter, she just complains
that it hurts too much so he stops. A doctor called in and told them that
it might just be a muscle contraction that wont let him in. Other people
on the phone said that her hymen may need to be cut! OUCH! Robin seems to
think that she should go out with a different guy because she doesn't seem
to like this guy enough. Howard thinks that she just needs to liqueured
up a bit. He want's Jackie to chaperon the two of them tomorrow night and
get them wasted enough to live with the pain. Howard also told Sean that
he should get a vibrator and use that to get her hot enough. Howard had
Gary get him a vibrator and a rubber woman so that he could demonstrate
for Sean.
July 31, 1996 - Meet the Interns
Well we only met one intern today but it was a hell of a meeting! Ahhhh...Christine...
the latest intern with great stories to tell...about lesbianism! 6' tall,
24 year old Christine came in to meet Howard and tell her life story. First
we found out that she was a cover model for 'Domination Directory International',
a magazine, and that she's done other modeling. She said that she's not
a Dominatrix though. She just did it as a job. Then we find out that she
likes women and that she's had two lesbian experiences! Christine went in
to detail about both experiences. The first experience was with a friend.
The two of them were 'man bashing' one night and drinking and the other
girl just said ''I'm ready'' to Christine. They went and did their thing
but Christine wouldn't let the other girl kiss her because she had bad breath
from smoking... Eventually the two of them were fighting and not getting
along so they went their separate ways. The second experience was even
more entertaining for Howard. He got aroused when Christine said that the
other woman took Christines clothes off. It didn't take long for a lesbian
listener to call in and request a date with Christine. The caller is supposed
to come in next week sometime. Another lesbian came by the studio to meet
Christine a little later in the show. This woman, Lorraine, was in the studio
a while back with her mother. They were strippers or something. Christine
and Lorraine met and got to hug. They both found each other very attractive
and it sounded like a love connection.
January 21, 1997 - The Intern Beauty Pageant! - 7:10am
Well today was the day for the big Intern Beauty Pageant production. There
were 5 female interns competing for the big prize today. Vanessa, Jennifer,
Amy, Jen and Beth were all included in this thing. Howard decided last week
to do this thing because there were so many great looking interns working
at the station. The judges of this contest were Larry 'Ratso' Slomann, Roger
Offner (Serial Killer Interviewer), Ross Zapin (National Alternative Promotion
Director for Geffen Records and friend of the show), Robin, Fred and Jackie
The JokeMan. Howard kept himself out of the judging for some odd reason.
The contest started off with the Sexy Outfit and Questioning portions. Howard
asked each girl questions such as ''What are your ambitions?'', ''Are you
for or against breast implants?'', ''What are your turn-offs?'', ''Do you
like to be spanked?'' and ''Which Judges turn you on?''. The judges were
grading on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest. After that portion
Gary sang a new version of ''You Are So Beautiful'' without music.. The
next portion of the contest was Talent. Vanessa did Meringue dancing with
a guy partner, Jennifer belched ''Baba Booey'' and ''F-Jackie'' then tied
a cherry stem with her tongue, Amy made her eyeballs flicker back and forth,
Beth danced to ''This Is How We Do It'' and did some back flips and Jen
hoola hooped her way through this part of the competition. Robin sang a
number between that portion and the next which is the evening gown portion.
Not much happened during this part. Howard was trying to rush through it
to get to Ivan Reitman's phone call. After the Evening Gown portion of the
pageant all of the scores were added up and each judge's top three were
announced.
The obvious winner was Beth. Beth topped almost all of the judges lists
for first place. It was her dancing talent that probably got her over the
top. Beth gets to take home $1000 plus a trip to Los Angeles and a bunch
of other prizes. After the winner was announced Howard, Robin, Gary, Jackie
and Fred all sang the closing song. Gary took a while to get the final scores
for the rest of the contestants so it was announced much later in the show.
At around 9:50 Gary gave the final standings. Beth had a total of 214
points, Vanessa had 187 and Amy came in a close third with 185 points. This
should be one hell of an E! show!
January 15, 1997 - Planning The Intern Beauty Pageant - 8:35am
There has been a lot of talk about the beautiful interns being hired at
K-Rock lately. Last week Howard and the gang discussed having an Intern
Beauty Pageant. Today Howard got to meet one of the interns that will be
competing. 19 year old Jennifer, who interns in the promotions department,
came into the studio to find out just what the beauty pageant will consist
of. The prize money will be $500 and there may be other prizes included.
Gary said that there will be about 4 categories:
1. Sexy Outfit
2. Evening Gown
3. Talent
4. Questioning
The sexy outfit doesn't have to be a bathing suit, although it would help.
So far they have about 6 interns that will compete. The pageant will probably
happen next Tuesday. Gary said that he wants to have some time to get organized
and have a set built for the E! show. One other contestant, Amy, is not
actually an intern but she was one 3 months ago so she gets to enter. Yet
another intern, Beth, called in to say that she's going to be competing.
Some of the potential judges are Lonnie Hanover from Scores, Larry 'Ratso'
Sloman and 'Grandpa' Al Lewis from the Munsters. This should be a hell of
a show next week. Jennifer was saying that she used to watch Howard's WWOR
tv show when she was a kid and she used to love him. Howard started saying
that he'd like to sleep with some of these young interns. Then someone pointed
out that Howard was graduating High School in 1972 and Jennifer wasn't born
until 1977. That may have put things in perspective for Howard.
February 18, 1997 - Carol Shia Comes In - 7:50am
Carol used to be a NYC cop until she posed in Playboy a few years ago.
She was fired after she posed in a police uniform for Playboy. Well now
she's become an actress. What she was supposed to do today was audition
a few women for a lesbian kissing scene that she'll be doing in a movie.
A couple of women came down to try out for the kiss. Howard interupted the
Carol thing so that he could watch the world premeire of the Porno For Pyros
video (from the Private Parts soundtrack) on MTV. He spent a few minutes
watching that and commenting on it and eventually got back to Carol. He
should have just stayed on the subject of the video because Carol was being
a real pain in the ass about the whole thing. She didn't really want to
do the kissing scene. Jackie and Fred wrote a scene for Carol to act out
with the other women but she was really reluctant about doing anything.
She did do the scene with a couple of women and also with Jen the intern.
The kisses didn't sound like much of anything until the last one. After
Carol had done the scenes with the 3 women she picked the one that she liked
the most and did a serious lesbian scene with her. It sounded like she finally
got into the kiss but the other woman pulled away after a couple of seconds.
This whole thing might be better on E! than it was on radio.. we'll have
to wait and see.
May 28, 1997 - Kevin The Giant Testicle Guy - 8:00am
This guy called in yesterday to tell Howard that he has a testicle the
size of a potato. Today the guy showed up at the studio to show off his
hugeness. Howard didn't waste much time before getting to see Kevin's ''potato''.
He asked Kevin how he came to have this abnormality. Kevin explained
how he had a varicose vein when he was young. It was removed but something
happened and his nut blew up like a balloon. Howard told the guy to show
him the thing so he did. Everyone, well all of the men in the studio, went
nuts when they saw the thing. Howard couldn't believe what he saw.
Robin couldn't believe her eyes either. All of the guys sounded like they
felt Kevin's pain. They were all moaning and groaning the whole time. Howard
had Robin Radzinski from E! come in and take a look also. After he showed
it to Robin he got to show 2 female interns his freak of nature. One
of the interns, Jacqueline, requested the viewing. Amy the intern also came
in to see it but she wasn't quite as excited to see the thing. Neither of
them said that they were turned on by it. After the guy left the studio
they took him into the office and made photocopies of his genital area.
Howard announced on the air that he'd fax it to some people if they called
in. Apparently the photocopy wasn't that great. It was too dark so the fax
might not have gone through very well. If anyone out there got one
of the faxes let me know how it came out.
July 31, 1997 - The Second Howard Stern Intern Beauty Pageant - 8:40am
Three lucky female interns had the chance to compete for the grand prize
consisting of a pair of round trip tickets to Paris (courtesy of Tower Air),
a bike (Courtesy of Rolling Rock Beer) and a diamond pendant valued at $500
from Fidelity Diamond. The guest judges were Fred the Elephant Boy, Crackhead
Bob, Captain Janks and Kenneth Keith Kallenbach who has his own album out
now! To order Kenneth's album ''Yeah'' just dial 800-963-3323. Howard and
the gang sang an opening song before starting the contest. Each contestant
came out dressed however they wanted to but then had to sing a Madonna song
for the talent section and then answer a couple of Howard's questions for
the personality section. Howard, Robin, Fred, Jackie and Gary were not involved
in the judging at all. Here are the contestants and what they did:
1. Amy - Tulane College
Madonna Song Performed: "Papa Don't Preach" - Not a great singer...
Questions:
"Who in history would you like to meet?"
Raif Fines from the movie "The English Patient"
"What was the most exciting day of your life?"
She said it was when she had a foursome with her friend and 2 guys a few
months ago!
2. Becky - Yale University
Madonna Song Performed: "Material Girl" - after inhaling helium.
Questions:
"How many sex partners should a girl have before marriage?"
Between 20 and 40! She's had between 5 and 10
"Is penis size important?"
Yes but she prefers something not too big, not too small.
3. Jacqueline - Perdue University
Madonna Song Performed: "Like A Virgin" while removing some of
her clothes.
Questions:
:Describe your womanly feelings the day you got your first period"
She said that days after it she just "shoved tissues up there".
"If you had your own talk show name the 3 people you would have on."
She said Abraham Lincoln, Brad Pitt and Howard Stern.
After all of the competition Howard took a break so all of the scores could
be tabulated. When they came back it was decided that they would not have
a second and third place because they didn't want one girl to be a huge
loser. During the commercial Kenneth Keith gave Becky his phone number.
Of course she's not going to call him but he gave it a try! Howard also
gave everyone's plugs before announcing the winner. Kenneth Keith of course
plugged his album ''Yeah'', Crackhead Bob plugged his web site: crackheadbob.com,
Captain Janks and Elephant Boy didn't really have anything of their own
to plug but all four of these guys will be appearing in Cleveland Ohio at
a Private Parts video release party. That will be happening on August 8th
at The Odeon. Crackhead Bob also announced that he will be getting married!!!
He spent $1600 on an engagement ring. After all of that stuff they got
around to announcing the winner. The winner was Becky! I don't know what
it was that got the votes but she pulled it off somehow. She said she'll
be taking her female friend with her on the trip.
August 8, 1997 - $500 An Hour Whore To Take Nick The Intern's Virginity
- 9:35am
Nick the intern revealed that he hadn't lost his virginity yet. The reason
it came up was because Howard had plans to go to Scores today and Nick wanted
to go. Howard was afraid to let him go because he knew that his mother would
get upset. During that discussion he made his revelation. Someone got his
mother on the phone so Nick could ask to go to Scores with Howard. His mother
said that he could go only if there wasn't going to be any touching involved.
Howard just told Nick that he couldn't go. He really wanted to go but it
didn't look good. So around 9:35 a woman called in and said she'd like to
take Nick's virginity. She claimed to be a $500 an hour prostitute.
Howard doesn't want to let him do anything with her because his mother
would get pretty upset with the whole thing. The prostitute is supposed
to come down to the studio so Howard can see what $500 an hour can buy.
It may happen on Monday so stay tuned.
December 17, 1997 - Intern Beauty Pageant 3 - 8:05am
Today was the third Howard Stern Intern Beauty Pageant. They're not really
yearly so I can't call it the third annual.. Today's judges were 3 big losers.
The first judge was Big Black (www.bigblack.com), the second judge was Slow
Adam, he was in one other time to have a Scores girl stand nude in front
of him. The third judge was High Pitch Eric. He's also been on the show
because of his horrible voice. He can't get laid either. The three interns
this year were Marla, Marti and Denise. There were three categories: Sexy
Outfit, Talent and Personality.
Each intern was dressed pretty sexy according to Howard. Big Black was the
angriest of the three judges. He didn't score very high for many of the
categories. The first intern, Marla was wearing a very short shirt and a
mini skirt, she sang a song parody to the tune of ''Tortured Man''. She's
a lesbian so the name of the song was ''Lesbian Chick''. Howard asked a
bunch of questions for the personality segment. The second intern was Marti.
She wore hot pants, a bra and a see through jacket. She sang a parody to
the tune of Tracy Chapman's ''Fast Car'' and it was about wining the contest.
The third intern, and winner, Denise was wearing a belly chain, bra and
vinyl pants. Her song was a parody of Madonna's ''Material Girl'' called
''Iranian Girl''. Denise changed her name from Iran to Denise a couple of
years ago. After Denise was done Howard said that Marla was supposed to
take off her top and show her breasts. She did it after the scoring so it
didn't change her score. She wanted to show everyone her nipple piercings.
What she didn't know was that her father was on the phone. He was very surprised.
It was Earth shattering news to him.
February 3, 1998 - Aza, The 20 Year Old Who Wants To Be An Intern -
8:55am
A woman called in and told Howard that she wanted to become an intern.
Howard said that he'd like an intern like Monica Lewinski allegedly was
for President Clinton. She said she could do that. Howard talked to her
for a few minutes and found out that she's not even in college, she works.
So brilliant Baba Booey came in and said that she could become Howard's
personal assistant instead of an intern. She's coming in for an ''interview''
tomorrow.
February 4, 1998 - Aza Comes In For Her Interview - 7:15am
Yesterday a woman called in and said she wanted to be an intern on Howard's
show. She said that she could be Howard's ''Monica Lewinski''. She claimed
that she was about 5'8'', 130 pounds. When she came in this morning it was
obvious to Howard that she lied about her weight. She was more like 150
or 160 pounds. Howard went along with the interview anyway. He had some
fun with her. Some guy called in when she came in and said that she stabbed
some guy at one time. It turned out that she was being stalked at one time
and she had to stab the guy a bunch of times when he came after her once.
She was just defending herself. Howard threw a twist into the interview.
He had these ''Tickling Panties'' which vibrate when Howard turns the switch.
He had Aza put the panties on for the interview. He started to question
her and quickly found out that she lied about her age. Yesterday she said
that she was 20. Today she said 19. As she was answering the questions that
Howard was asking he would turn the knob for the panties. She was going
nuts and couldn't sit still. She kept giggling and crossing and uncrossing
her legs. Howard loves these Tickling Panties. The buzzing coming from the
panties sounded like a chainsaw off in the distance. The questions that
Howard was asking were the typical questions asked of intern applicants.
Aza couldn't give a decent answer because she was so distracted by the vibrating
panties. Just a note, the woman who designed the panties will be in next
week sometime. Aza was enjoying the panties so Howard said that she could
keep them. No one else would want to wear them anyway. Howard took a commercial
break after he was done with Aza. When he came back he said that Aza actually
put the panties on over her regular panties so the effect was diluted a
bit. He had her change back into the vibrating panties without her normal
panties on. He then had her try and sing ''The Star Spangled Banner'' and
say the pledge of allegiance. She kept giggling and squirming so she couldn't
finish any of it. She said the alphabet pretty well and sang a little bit
of ''Row, Row, Row Your Boat'' before leaving. The ''Tickling Panties''
are going to be the next big thing on the show. Howard said they ordered
100 of them for future shows.
February 9, 1998 - Eileen's Intern Interview - 7:20am
Last week Howard had a woman in who said she wanted to be Howard's intern.
He put her in a pair of vibrating underwear while he gave her an interview.
Well another woman came down today to do the same thing. The only problem
is that this woman turned out to be a cold fish. She wasn't nearly as into
the panties as Aza was last week. Howard also said that there are two types
of these panties. There's the Tickling Panties and there's Remote Control
Vibrating Panties. One pair that Eileen wore didn't fit her quite right
so the vibrating part wouldn't stay where it was supposed to unless she
crossed her legs. Howard had her try on both pair but neither one of them
really got her off. Eileen's not a college student so there's no way she
can be an intern. Howard told her that they'd keep her in mind just in
case something came up though.
May 15, 1998 - Intern Beauty Pageant - 8:10am
This is number 3 in a line of Intern Beauty Pageants. Howard decided about
a year and a half ago to have a beauty pageant for his beautiful interns.
This pageant is a little different. There are 3 women and one guy in this
pageant. The judges are as follows: Slow Adam, Gary the Retard from Oregon,
O.J. Mask (Neil), and Ralph. Gary the retard has called in many times on
the show but today was his first time in the studio. Howard loves his retarded
voice and now his toothless face. Slow Adam, who's not retarded, has been
a judge in the past and does a nice job. This pageant was a little rushed
this time. They usually take time giving scores for each category like sexy
outfit, personality and talent. Today they rushed through each contestant
and announced the winner after taking a break. Here's a quick rundown of
each contestant:
Shannon - Shannon wore a sexy outfit that showed a little bit of cleavage.
She dated a guy who had a huge penis but says size doesn't matter. She sang
''I'm a Full C''(about her cup size) to the tune of The Eagles ''Take It
Easy''.
Erica - Says she's a 21 year old virgin although she's given oral sex to
guys. Was deprived of most television when she was a kid. She sang a parody
of ''My Favorite Things'' from The Sound Of Music for her talent portion.
Michael - The only male contestant. Wore a vinyl suit for his sexy outfit.
Says he has a big penis but has never had the chance to use it. 20 year
old virgin. Had his chance to get laid but didn't because the girl was known
as a slut. Sang ''Like a Douche Bag'' to the tune of Madonna's ''Like a
Virgin'' for talent portion.
Heather - Wore a see through dress that came off after her talent segment.
26 year old ex-Knicks City Dancer who had one lesbian experience at age
22. Once had 4 orgasms in one day. Read a poem about Howard for her talent
segment. Took her dress off to show off her bikini clad body. After all
of the contestants did their thing Gary tabulated the votes and announced
the winner. Second runner up was Shannon. The winner was Heather. Her lesbian
story and the fact that she took off her dress helped push her over the
top. Congratulations to Heather. She won a whole list of stuff that's
so long that I didn't have time to write it all down.
June 12, 1998 - Stuttering John Interviews A Few Celebrities - 7:20am
Stuttering John was at the premiere of ''Six Days, Seven Nights'' last
night. He interviewed Harrison Ford, Michael Bolton, Ann Hache and Miss
Universe. As soon as John started to ask Harrison Ford questions his publicist
told him where John was from. He asked him why he didn't take acting lessons
and Harrison just said ''I used the money for beer.'' Then John asked him
if he had the biggest schlong in Hollywood and Harrison said ''yes'' and
walked away. The Michael Bolton interview was kind of lame. John got off
a couple of questions but after asking Bolton if he was happy with his penis
size Bolton bolted. John got off about 2 questions with Ann Hache. They
weren't that great though. She ran off after John asked her if she'd do
a movie with Woody Allen. John got to ask Miss Universe a few questions
but she was so out of it she didn't realize she was being goofed on. After
he asked her a question about the President Clinton/Monica Lewinsky thing
her publicist pulled her away. Not too long after that Lisa the intern caught
up to her and asked her ''Do you allow yourself to be photographed while
on your period?''. She didn't get an answer from her so she kept asking
the same question over and over again.
July 31, 1998 - Corey The Intern Interviews Richard Simmons - 6:20am
Howard sent out female intern Corey to interview Richard Simmons at a mall
appearance. Corey is a sweet looking young woman who doesn't look like she's
from the Stern show. She said that it was a really tough interview. This
was her first and last interview. It was so tough that she doesn't want
to do any more interviews. She started off with some easy questions for
Richard. She asked him a diet question and he answered it. The she asked
him if he ever plans on getting married. Richard said that he's 50 years
old and all of the people who are his fans are his wives and children. The
next question was tough. She asked him if he thinks that fat people are
mentally ill. Richard found that question offensive and said that obesity
is not caused by mental illness. The question that freaked Richard out was
''Were you molested as a child?''. That one drove him over the edge and
he ended the interview. Corey was so embarrassed that she just left the
mall.
August 4, 1998 - Benji The Intern's Sex Adventure - 8:50am
Benji the intern is having sex with a married woman who has children.
Howard heard about this and just had to talk about it on the air. Benji
met this woman through a personal ad in the newspaper. In the ad the woman
said that she was married with children and just wanted to have sex.
Benji called and hooked up with her. It turns out that she's actually good
looking and in her 30's. The first time they met they just went out to a
bar. The second time was more like a date and they ended up having sex.
As a matter of fact Benji got oral sex and had anal sex with the woman on
that date. Now he's going out with her once every week or week and a half.
Way to go Benji!
August 12, 1998 - 1998 Summer Intern Beauty Pageant - 8:00am
It's that time of year once again. The latest batch of interns are ending
their run at the Stern show so it's time to have a beauty pageant. The judges
this time are Francisco the Stutterer, Gary the Retard and Ralph the
Fag. The contestants are judged on 3 categories:
Outfit, Personality and Talent. Here are the contestants:
Debra: Debra is 21, blonde and 5'9'' tall. Howard asked her a few questions
to get an idea of her personality. Here are a couple of the questions:
What was your most embarrassing moment?
The time she bad mouthed Lisa the intern when she was in the same room.
How many sex partners should a woman have before marriage?
5 or less
Is penis size important?
Yes
For her talent she sang a song parody of ''Big Spender''.
Corey: Corey is an asian intern with a C-cup breast size. She's 5'4''
tall, 120 pounds and her measurements are 34-28-34. She was wearing an evening
gown that covered her up. Here are a couple of her personality questions:
What was the most exciting day of your life?
Yesterday when she met LL Cool J.
If you had your own talk show who would you have on it?
Howard, James Dean and her grandfather.
How many sex partners should a woman have before marriage?
Less than 10.
Is penis size important?
Not really.
Corey performed a parody of that awful Celine Dion song from Titanic.
Lisa: Lisa has been in beauty pageants before so she had a slight advantage.
She's a 36 C-cup and she was showing some cleavage unlike the other two
contestants. Ralph didn't like her personality from the beginning
so he brought it up in the middle of her personality segment. He didn't
like the way she treated him before she knew he was a judge. That may have
affected her scores.
Here are a few of her questions:
What was the most exciting day of your life?
The day she found out she was going to be an intern for the Stern show.
If you had your own talk show who would you have on it?
Her mom, Donald Trump and someone who's against beauty pageants.
How many sex partners should a woman have before marriage?
A few.
Are you wearing panties?
No.
For her talent Lisa performed a song parody of ''Every Breath
You Take''.
What a close pageant this was! The winner won by a mere half a point! Lisa
came in last surprisingly. Debra won and gets a bunch of small prizes for
her trouble.